Newslysses Issue: 366 June 2012

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1 Newslysses Issue: 366 June 2012 Meet every Sunday for a breakfast run departing from Bimbo s, 5th Avenue, Northmead Benoni, at 8:15am Contact: Chairperson: Llewellyn Collins Cell: wells@hotmail.co.za Vice Chairperson: Allen Burger Cell: allenburger@vodamail.co.za Ulysses East Rand on the Web: ================================================================== Planned Rides :( subject to change) Month Date Venue Area June 17 th Ndlovu Lodge Father s Day Run Pretoria East 24th Premier Hotel Cullinan July 1st Mikes Kitchen Lambton Backfiring from the chair: I missed the ride on Sunday, but see that even with the cold our die hard s still heated up the tarmac. After reading the captains log I think we may have to change the venue for the 24 th, any suggestions will be greatly appreciated. Our Father s Day run to Ndlovu Lodge has been booked; don t forget to bring the young in. I also would like to remind our lady riders that you are also invited to Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 1

2 attend the Father s Day ride as we could not have completed the transition to fatherhood without you! The breakfast run on Sunday 1 st July 2012 will be at Mikes Kitchen in Lambton where after we plan to head out to the Classic Bike Club s 1000 Bike Show. If you are planning to visit the show on Saturday, why not join us again on Sunday! Those of you, who have dirt bikes and would like to do an organised ride, check out the day ride planned for the 28 th! Go well, Wells. Captains Log: Sunday 10 th June 2012 I personally don t think that I have endured a colder Sunday ride than yesterday s Breakfast run and I was on the shorter ride up north to Kittyhawk Airfield. As is normally the case, the only part of the anatomy that was frozen was my hands. Even wearing good inner gloves and my thickest Thinsulated leather winter gloves, my hands absolutely froze! At the same time, spare a thought for the bigger group of around nine UER stalwarts and visitors, who braved the ride down to Lakeview Inn in Denneysville on the Vaal Dam where the cold factor on their ride was probably two or three degrees lower than the 0.5 degrees C that we were experiencing on our lesser group ride to Zwavelpoort! This ensuing account is on the Kittyhawk ride. Allen took the trouble to drive through to Bimbo s to chat and assist as Wells is laid up in bed with a bad dose of Flu. The manne who came on both runs were: Nigel BMW K 1300 R Rob BMW 1200 RT Rudi Suz Busa 1340 GSXR Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 2

3 Mike C BMW 1200GT Trevor Triumph 1700 F/Bird Storm Dale (visitor) Triumph 1050 Tiger Mike O D BMW K1200 S (Grants bike) Grant Honda CBX 1000 RR Clive Honda 1200 VFR Mathew Suz 600 naked four Visitor BMW K1000 RS Lady Visitor (Grant) BMW 1200GT Visitor (did not see bike) Graham BMW 1300GT Allen DNR. The smaller ride group were Trevor, Rudi, Rob, Dale and Mike C. We set off just after the main group had left and we rode towards Bapsfontein for the first stop. There was a moerofa skraal windtjie blowing, dropping the windchill factor to minus 7 degrees (according to info from Big Rob s intelligent cell-phone). Riding in front, I lowered our cruise speed to 130/140 as higher speed froze my hands even more and the wind was bad enough to blow clouds of dust into the bikes and causing us to ride at an angle! While riding, I alternated putting each hand onto the engine cylinders for warmth but very little heat got through until we stopped, idling at the Baps crossroads. We passed umpteen Harleys and other cruisers on the way, all of which were also battling the elements. At around two kilo s from the Cullinen turnoff we encountered a totally dug up road and a dreaded contra-flow stop & go booth which was manned by three ladies. The boom was down to stop the traffic heading north. Rudi who is impatient by nature, gunned his Busa and took off as we could not see any traffic heading towards us. The rest of us stopped behind about ten cars. I eventually passed the cars slowly and spying the three ladies in overall s, I asked what the hold-up time would be. Eish, we don t know sed one of them, where are you going? she asked and on my cullinen reply, she let us through. It s good that they are fixing the road surface but we must keep this hold-up in mind for future rides on this road! We were all well frozen by the time we reached Kittyhawk Restaurant and the expected fire had not been lit so it was also quite cold in the restaurant. Our UER fire chief Mike C threw his considerable weight around to the management and staff and they scurried to fetch the firewood and matches. Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 3

4 In no time a raging inferno was in place and we were able to take turns warming up. Coffee here is still not bottomless and our table took a long time before the orders materialized. The food was nicely prepared and tasty and hot when it finally arrived. Amazingly a Gyrocopter managed to land in spite of the heavy and constant wind blowing across the runway. A small single wing plane also tried to approach but eventually gave up and carried on flying looking for somewhere else to land. We left together after breakfast and some of us took the longer Wapanrand route back to miss the contra-flow and to meet the Bronkies road just before Que Sera. Even the return trip was cold and our fingers froze again. I hope the braver guys and lady fared as well on their longer ride down South and look forward to next week s ride to Ndlovu Lodge I think it is? Anyway, hopefully next Sunday will be warmer. Until then, I ll see-ya (disappearing) in da mirrors, Twisty Two. A woman went to the service counter and told the clerk she wanted a refund for the toaster she bought because it won t work. The clerk told her that he can t give her a refund because she bought it on special. Suddenly, the woman threw her arms up in the air and started screaming, PINCH MY NIPPLES, PINCH MY NIPPLES!!! The befuddled clerk ran away to the store manager in front of a growing crowd of customers. The manager comes to the woman and asks, ma am whats wrong? She explains the problem with the toaster, and he also tells her that he can t give her a refund because she bought it on special. Once again, the woman throws her arms in the up in the air and screams, PINCH MY NIPPLES, PINCH MY NIPPLES!!! Which begins to draw an even bigger crowd! In shock, the store manager pleads, ma am, why are you saying that? In a huff the woman says, BECAUSE I LIKE TO HAVE MY NIPPLES PINCHED WHEN I M BEING SCREWED!!! The crowd broke into applause and her money was quickly refunded! Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 4

5 Got home late last night and the wife had left a message in the kitchen A husband kicks his wife out the house in the 8 th month of her pregnancy! When asked why he simply replied; no fat chicks in the house, rules are rules! Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 5

6 Deneysville Frozen Butt Dash: as described by Mike O D. And so winter decided that it was time to arrive and with heaps of snow around the country and temperatures plummeting way below zero, Sunday morning dawns in Gauteng and the mercury drops to levels we haven t seen in a ages! Frigging cold is all I can say, but nothing to keep us disgracefuls from getting on our bikes and getting in a ride after a tough work week! I took my Triumph in for service on Saturday morning and will collect it again before next week s ride. The planned destination for this weekend s breakfast run was Lake Avenue in Deneysville. I was certainly looking forward to ride but with my bike in for service, I was not that keen on riding on Ally s 650 Dragstar Cruiser! Grant kindly offered me his BMW for the ride and I honestly appreciated his gesture thanks my mate Grant although in hindsight, I m sure you rued this offer as you gave up your bike that had heated grips!! On arrival at Bimbo s we found there was a reasonable turn out all huddled inside drinking coffee and hot chocolate. As is often the case on our Sunday rides, there were 2 destinations of choice firstly the published ride to Deneysville and a short ride to Kitty Hawk. Our trusty scribe Twisty 2 was doing the short run so Allen asked if I would submit a ride report for our run. Those who chose the Deneysville ride were as follows: Grant Honda CBR 1000 Clive Honda VFR 1200 Nigel BMW 1300R Mike O D Grant s BMW K1200 Graham BMW 1200 GT Mathew Suzuki 600 Visitor Marlize BMW GT Visitor (Marlize s Oom) Suzuki GSX 1000 Visitor (Mathew s Mate) BMW RT Nigel led the ride and decided to follow the shorter route via Rotunda. The roads were very quiet and no other bikes were seen en-route. Nothing much to report in terms of the ride except that it really was cold. On arrival at Lake Avenue there were a total of just 2 other bikes with another 4 arriving a short while after us!! We were shown to a part of the restaurant upstairs, an area filled with direct sunlight. The usual pay as you eat buffet was on offer. Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 6

7 Soaking up the sun!! (L R Clive, visitor and Mike O D) After the usual banter, it was time to get back home. By now the wind had picked up and it was still chilly. Some of our visitors needed to re-fuel and finally we left Deneysville, riding in a group. Another great Sunday ride, not even the cold could keep us die hard old buggers away!!! Until next week, Mike O D. The original Spear Of The Nation! Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 7

8 A d v e r t Day ride: Saturday 28th July 2012 Dirtbikes, Quads and Side by sides all welcome!! Near Cullinan, only 40 minutes from JHB International Airport Lots of riders have asked us to put this ride together again, so here goes We will mark the route (100 kay s or so), arrive in the morning we will have coffee and rusks ready to wake you up and get you going. We will work out a whole route for you to enjoy at your own pace the farmers will once again open the lands to us. Rocky sections, fast open plains, forested trails it s all there for you to enjoy technical and easy. Our team will be along to assist and take piccy s. You can order a disc with all of the photos on the day. When you get back, you can enjoy a lekker lunch properly catered not just a bun and, if you feel like it, you can go and ride the routes all over again. We will have marshals along to assist and our Resolution Insurance medical team will be along for the day. It s going to be great fun, no long boring roads but lots of tight, twisty sections for you to enjoy. This is fun for the whole family come and get muddy Adults R Kids under 12 R Please fill out this form and fax it through to: We will send confirmation and directions the week before the ride. Name. Adults.. Kids.. Phone no. address. Fax no Family adventures Banking details: Standard Bank. Festival mall. Account no: Branch code: Ref: Your name and Cullinan Our details: foleyg@mweb.co.za Phone (011) Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 8

9 Schoolboy 50cc Run Modderfontein 10 th June 2012 Murray Russell I managed to haul my butt out of bed on the coldest day of the year and head off to Modderfontein to check out the Schoolboy 50cc Run. The gathering point was the Shell grudge in Modderfontein and then the bikes set off on a jolly jaunt around the Modderfontein grounds. I arrived just in time to follow some of the bikes, and the smell of 2-stroke mix in the fresh morning air took me back to the days of my youth. The ride ended at 33 High Street restaurant for brekky and slow races and drag races and much fun was had by all. This event was organised by a very able Tim Romans (Son of our very own Tony Romans) of the Classic Bike Club committee. Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 9

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11 Some photos from our last run to the Classic Bike Club 03/06/2012 Not for use by under forties Age restriction 40 SNLV 11