The Sirens of Titan. Based on the novel "The Sirens of Titan" By Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. Adapted by Stuart Gordon

Transcription

1 The Sirens of Titan Based on the novel "The Sirens of Titan" By Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. Adapted by Stuart Gordon

2

3 CHUCKLES, EXPLODES, GRABS THE PAPER FROM HIM, CRUMPLES IT, AND THROWS IT ON THE FLOOR. KAZAK BARKS. Good God, what made you do that? Don't you know everything? Does anybody have to tell you anything? Just read my mind. (PUTTING HIS HANDS TO HIS TEMPLES) Static -- all I get is static. What else would there be but static? I'm going to be thrown right out into the street without even the price of a meal -- and my husband wants to make me into a space whore! MONCRIEF ENTERS. You called, Mum? MONCRIEF It was more of a scream, Montcrief. She doesn t want anything,, thank you. We were simply having a spirited discussion. MONCRIEF SNAPS A LEASH ONTO KAZAK AND BEGINS TO LEAD HIM OFFSTAGE. How dare you say whether I want something or not? I m beginning to catch on that you re not nearly as omniscient as you pretend to be. It so happens that I want something very much. I want a number of things very much. Mum? MONCRIEF (CONTINUED)

4 CONTINUED: 2. I d like you to let the dog stay, please. I d like to pet him before he goes. I would like to find out if a chrono-synclastic infundibula kills love in a dog the way it kills love in a man. That was a pretty scene to play before the servant. MONCRIEF HANDS THE LEASH TO, BOWS AND EXITS. By and large my contribution to the dignity of the family has been somewhat greater than yours. (HANGING HIS HEAD) I ve failed you in some way? Is that what you re saying? In some way? In every way! What would you have me do? You could have told me the stock market crash was coming. If you had one shred of concern for me, couldn't you tell me exactly how Malachi Constant of Hollywood is going to try to trick me into going to Mars, so I could outwit him? Look, life for a punctual person is like a roller coaster. All kinds of things are going to happen to you. Sure, I can see the whole roller coaster you're on. And sure -- I could give you a piece of paper that would tell you about every dip and turn, warn you about every bogeyman that was going to pop out at you in the tunnels, but that wouldn't help you any. I don't see why not. Because you'd still have to take the roller coaster ride. I didn't design the roller coaster. I don't own it. And I don't say who rides and who doesn't. I just know what it's shaped like. (CONTINUED)

5 CONTINUED: (2) 3. And Malachi Constant is part of the roller coaster? Yes. And there's no avoiding him? No. I know a little something about roller coasters, too. That's good. When I was ten years old, my father got it into his head that it would be fun for me to ride a roller coaster, so we drove over to an amusement park. I took one look at the roller coaster and it looked silly and dirty and dangerous, and I simply refused to get on. My own father couldn't make me get on, even though he was Chairman of the Board of the New York Central Railroad. We turned around and came home. That's the way to treat roller coasters. STARTS TO WALK OUT WITH KAZAK. By the way, if it seems crude of me not to hate the idea of your pairing off with Constant, it's only a humble admission on my part that he's going to make you a far better husband than I ever was or will be. HE TAKES HER IN HIS ARMS. (CONT D) Look forward to being really in love for the first time, by the way. Look forward to having nothing but the dignity and the intelligence that God gave you -- look forward to taking those materials and nothing else and making something exquisite with them. THE INFUNDIBULUM SOUNDS AND LIGHTS BEGIN AGAIN. (CONTINUED)

6 CONTINUED: (3) 4. MONCRIEF HANDS HIS SPACE HELMET. (CONT D) (TAKING KAZAK FROM ) Oh, God, you talk about a roller coaster -- stop and think sometime about the roller coaster I'm on. Some day on Titan, it will be revealed to you just how ruthlessly I've been used, and by whom, and to what disgustingly paltry ends.