chapter Profile: Steelmantown Cemetery, Upper Township, N.J. by Thomas A. Parmalee executive editor, Kates-Boylston Publications

Transcription

1 chapter 8 Profile: Steelmantown Cemetery, Upper Township, N.J. by Thomas A. Parmalee executive editor, Kates-Boylston Publications Green Funeral Service Desk Reference 37

2 Chapter 8 Even with unmarked graves, cracked tombstones and makeshift markers, Edward Fox Bixby II can recall a time when Steelmantown Cemetery was bright and thriving. Edward Fox Bixby II drove down Steelmantown Road in Upper Township, N.J., and into the woods in December 2007, anxious to inspect a 7.5-acre parcel of land that he thought would be a prime building site for two houses. Bixby, co-owner of Fox & Fox Builders in Cape May County, N.J., grew up in the area, so he was in familiar territory. But he was still taken aback when he looked at the adjacent piece of land - Steelmantown Cemetery - and saw that it was overrun with saplings, brush and garbage. My family has lived near Steelmantown (part of Upper Township) Below: Edward Fox Bixby II with his daughter, Ava. Opposite Page: A cracked stone at Steelmantown Cemetery, Upper Township, N.J., when Bixby first bought the property. (Photos courtesy of Edward Fox Bixby II) 38 Green Funeral Service Desk Reference for probably 125 years, maybe 150 years, so a lot of my relatives are buried in the cemetery, Bixby said. The place was in horrific condition, so I went to the person who owned it and said, You have to clean the place up; it looks terrible. And he said, I have no money to clean it up. That answer didn t satisfy Bixby, whose infant brother was buried at the burial ground. But then, the owner of the cemetery, retired funeral home owner Jack Langley, made an unexpected offer: If Bixby wanted the cemetery, he could have it. It was a strange proposition for someone who knew nothing about owning a cemetery. Bixby, after all, is a builder and landscaper. He knew that he better think long and hard about acquiring a piece of land just because it was there for the taking. I was on the fence, he said. I didn t know what I should do. I talked to an insurance provider and asked, If I own this, what if someone gets hurt? I didn t want to get myself into something that could cost me a lot of money. Any decision, he knew, must have the support of his wife. He couldn t just come home and tell her he now owned a cemetery. So essentially, I came home my wife s an attorney and I said to her, What are the ramifications of owning a cemetery. And I told her that the owner said the cemetery was full and he didn t think it had any value. Bixby s wife, Kristin, asked him why he couldn t just clean up the cemetery, ease his conscience and move on. But Bixby knew that wasn t really a permanent solution. If something happens to me in five years, it s just going to be back to where it was, Bixby said. Someone had to make it right. So, without further debate, Kristin Bixby drew up the paperwork so her husband could take possession of the burial ground, which is located in the middle of the Belleplain State Forest. He thought he was just doing a good deed. But later, he would find out he was wrong. Steelmantown s History The history of Steelmantown is intertwined with Upper Township, the community to which it belongs. Upper Township was formed in 1798, and the cemetery was founded in the Revolutionary War era. In 1957, Langley, now a retired funeral home owner, bought the cemetery for $35 at a township auction. Earlier, a school had been located on the land but it was destroyed by fire around 1918, Bixby said. A year later, Langley won a contract from the state to bury children from the Woodbine Developmental Center, a residential facility founded in 1921 that serves people with mental and other developmental disabilities. The school couldn t find any cemeteries locally that didn t require concrete vaults and such and didn t want to pay jack for embalming fluids and such, Bixby said. Jack was charging about $10 per person, doing partly a good deed. According to Bixby, the children of Woodbine, who were mostly orphans, deserved better. It s really kind of a sin, he said. They didn t even have markers until a Boy Scout about three or four years ago did a project and got the bricks engraved. They were just put there and forgotten. I hate to say it but it was almost like a place to get rid of them.

3 Profile: Steelmantown Cemetery, Upper Township, N.J. Green Funeral Service Desk Reference 39

4 Chapter 8 Steelmantown continued to bury children from the center until about 1980, just a couple years before the heart of the burial ground Steelmantown Southern Baptist Church burned to the ground in a prank gone bad. With the disappearance of the church, the cemetery began to die. Even with unmarked graves, cracked tombstones and makeshift markers, Bixby can recall a time when the burial ground was bright and thriving. As a child, he recalls playing among its giant oak trees without a care in the world. When Langley passed over ownership of the cemetery to Bixby, he told him that he owned only one portion of the cemetery where the schoolchildren from Woodbine were buried. The other section, he said, belonged to another area church. Bixby got the first hint that 40 Green Funeral Service Desk Reference Steelmantown hid a secret when he called up the other house of worship, Calvary Baptist Church, and explained that the cemetery was overgrown and that they should take care of their portion. They called back and said, We don t know what you are talking about. We don t own that cemetery, Bixby said. It was the first hint that something might be wrong. Bixby Gets the Shock of his Life About two weeks after taking ownership of Steelmantown, Bixby hired someone to conduct a routine survey. He had gotten a hand-sketched map from Langley, but he didn t want to waste any time clearing someone else s land. The professional survey cost $200, but he decided it was worth the expense. When the results came back, Bixby could not believe what he saw. The cemetery, which had been given to him for nothing, was actually an acre, not a halfacre. Even more shocking: A cemetery that was supposed to be full actually had room for an additional 400 burials. If (the previous owner) had properly surveyed the cemetery, he would have realized how much bigger it was and would have kept burying there, he said. Bixby, of course, didn t have the slightest idea of how to actually operate a cemetery. He applied for a cemetery sales license, however, and began reading up on the cemetery business. And he suddenly found himself very grateful that Langley had at least faithfully paid a small fee every year to keep the cemetery s certificate of authority current. There was

5 Profile: Steelmantown Cemetery, Upper Township, N.J. Above and Opposite Page: Scenes from Steelmantown Cemetery, Upper Township, N.J. (Photos courtesy of Edward Fox Bixby II) even a couple thousand dollars to work with in the maintenance fund. It was hard work bringing the cemetery back to some semblance of its former decency. Bixby and his father hauled away about 20 dump truck loads of brush, trash and debris. What we did, somebody probably would have charged about $10,000 to do, Bixby said. There were also sunken graves throughout the cemetery. Every time we'd go out there after it rained, we'd find the top of headstones, Bixby said. Gravity just pulled them straight down. At least 60 headstones we raised. To beautify the cemetery, Bixby sought funding. But no one wanted to help. The Woodbine Development Center, which had about 135 children buried there, turned away. So far, Bixby hasn't had much luck getting money from anywhere. Even with space for added burials, it didn t seem as though a small cemetery located in the middle of the woods was such a great asset. But Bixby became more interested in its potential when he read an article in a local newspaper about green burial. So he contacted the Green Burial Council, and they sent Donna Larsen, their outreach and educational coordinator, to look at the burial ground. She loved it and said she never saw anything like it, Bixby said. She said she felt like she was going back in time. These were welcome words to Bixby. I was nervous when the lady from the Green Burial Council came down, he admitted. It made me feel good to hear her say she liked it, and she said it was really special. Bixby also found the state to be more interested in the cemetery when he floated the possibility that it could be used as a way to conserve land. I called the state s Green Acres program and pitched the idea of it being a green cemetery, and they loved it. They thought it was the greatest thing, Bixby said. So, what began as a good deed became something more. Having already done a habitat assessment of the area, the cemetery quickly earned Green Burial Council approval. At that point, Bixby began crunching numbers. He saw that a nearby cemetery was charging $500 for a single plot, so he initially considered charging $600 a space. But then he met Bob Prout, with Prout Funeral Home in Verona, N.J., who convinced him that the nearby cemetery Green Funeral Service Desk Reference 41

6 Chapter 8 Bixby knows he got a little lucky as far as the size of the cemetery, but he is happy to have gotten the opportunity to right a wrong. For many years, his mother was haunted by the idea of her infant son being buried in an overgrown cemetery. was not in such a unique setting and wasn t really his competition. His suggestion: Consider charging $1,000 per space and $2,000 for double burial plots and putting more in the maintenance fund. I thought that was a lot of money, Bixby said. But (Prout) said to charge $2,000 and put 30 percent in the maintenance fund. I tried it and sold three of them. People came down, and they loved it. I realized then that I had something pretty viable. Below: Two of the many unique memorials found at Steelmantown Cemetery. Going Green Bixby has never really considered himself an environmentalist, but like most people, he does his best to have a minimal effect on the environment. I ve had a landscaping business for 13 years, so I ve always been into the gardening thing, he said. I do agree with the principle of what green burial provides, and I think it's foolish to have your body pumped with chemicals. Steelmantown, with its giant oak trees and old-feel setting, is ideally suited to be a green cemetery. Virtually all the burials have been in plain pine boxes, and there are no concrete vaults. From a marketing perspective, it s a perfect fit. What we ve opted to do, we want to have the least amount of environmental impact out here, Bixby explained. The graves are going to be hand dug. I have a couple masons who work for me, and they will be doing that work. We just seeded a whole new area in wildflowers and grasses that are native to this area of New Jersey. About 30 different funeral directors have already contacted the cemetery. A handful of plots have already sold. Looking Back with An Eye to the Future Since that day in December, Bixby s plan for the 7.5-acre property he initially visited has changed. He hasn t bought it yet, but he intends to but not to build homes. I know I can get the property, and I think where it s located in the state forest and everything, the state would probably push it right through as it would be a conservation cemetery, Bixby said. They d rather see that than two houses there. Langley, the previous owner of the cemetery was in a tough spot when it came to the cemetery s upkeep. Mr. Langley is 87, and he s a nice guy, he said. I think he was doing a good thing it just turned out bad. He didn t have any money to take care of it in the end, and it was just a burden to him. Essentially, he was giving away what he thought was a burden. Bixby knows he got a little lucky as far as the size of the cemetery, but he is happy to have gotten the opportunity to right a wrong. For many years, his mother was haunted by the idea of her infant son being buried in an overgrown cemetery. When the baby was buried there in 1956, it was still a regular cemetery, Bixby said. She went to Jack at one time and wanted to know if she could move the baby, but he said it was in a wicker basket, and there would just be nothing left. Against all odds, Bixby now finds himself in the strange situation adding the word cemeterian to his resume. It s something he never anticipated. To open a new cemetery in New Jersey, you need an enormous amount of money, he said. You need to devote an initial $75,000 to the maintenance fund, and I just never would have considered it. But because Langley kept the cemetery up to code as far as the paperwork is concerned, all Bixby has to do is start raising money through the sale of burial plots. He ll put 30 percent instead of the usual 15 percent into the fund, he said. I think I m really going to pull from urban areas, Bixby said. There are people from Philadelphia and the New York area who have a special feeling for the area down here. They vacation here and have a lot of good times. As far as going down a road he never thought he would travel, perhaps it can be attributed to good karma. I think we took something that I guess was neglected and maybe we are getting repaid for our good deed, Bixby said. I didn t do it for this. I thought I'd have to get someone to donate some money toward it, and unfortunately no one has been willing to do that. Everyone has just wiped their hands of it. 42 Green Funeral Service Desk Reference